being a mom this year

On my birthday last year, I was so sleep-deprived. That's almost all I can remember about turning 29. I was facing a BIG away wedding in which Eben and I both had important roles, and then a work trip to Europe (and back in those days, everywhere the breasts went the baby went so this trip meant hauling my whole family 1/2 way around the world and back.) I was so exhausted that looking at my busy calendar felt like looking up the slopes of Everest. I was back at work, but only part-time and with minimal childcare, a hybrid situation that didn't pan out very well. I was trying to write a dissertation proposal through the mental fog of NEVER sleeping more than about 3 hours in a row and the inconvenience of never having more than a few hours to work at a time.

It was rough.

Now, at 30, I have a completely different kid. A kid who will volunteer the fact that she is a "kid" (not a baby) whenever the subject comes up. (She points to the middle of her belly and says "Monroe kid." She also calls herself "good girl.") A kid who can eat with a fork, drink from a straw, even blow her own nose. A kid WHO SLEEPS ALL NIGHT LONG. And I have real work days with real child care in which to do my job, and enough time and mental energy to see friends, take care of myself and even try to help others in my own small way. I am living a completely different life than I had 1 year ago, and I am very grateful. This mommy thing seems pretty do-able from here.

A few great Monroe-related moments from the past year of life:

• The many leisurely weekend breakfasts we've had at le pain quotidien, including this one. I think it was that day that looked at ourselves and thought, "wow--we have a life again!"
  
  
• The night last summer when she first went to sleep by herself and slept all night without awakening.
  
  
• The evening she started singing along with the ABC song, and all the adorable times she's sung it since then.
  
  
• The weekend afternoon a few months ago when, while we were all out walking as a family, Monroe pointed to me and said "mama friend!"